Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Empty nest syndrome? So I'm feeling down today. You'd think it was becuase of Dad being gone and it being the day after Memorial Day weekend, but it was because yesterday we dropped off Michael to his uncle's house. Luckily his counselor felt it would a good idea for us to maintain some quality time with him at least once a week and for us that will mean on the weekends being it's such a trip back and forth. Although it feels as if he's 18 and going away forever, he's only going to be gone one week at a time. It's weird though. Last night I felt as if a part of my existence went with him. I can't explain what it's like to those of you that are not mothers.
I hope this will prepare me for when the real thing happens with not only Michael, but with Jacob and Savannah as well. I know that as a parent we can get wrapped up in our own personal, professional, and parental life with the many schedules to meet that sometimes we take for granted that our kids will always be there. For now I will miss seeing him at the bus stop in the morning, I will miss picking him up from tutoring, I will miss hearing him rustle around in his room, and I'll miss his help around the house and with Savannah. I only wonder if he misses me as much as I do him. I had the urge to call him last night around bedtime, but held back.
I need to remember this time is for his own good and in some ways for mine. In order for kids to grow, they also need space. But how do you live with someone from the time they were born up to now and just let them go without an aching heart? I think about the future when all the kids will be gone and am thankful that I do have a husband near me. Only three short years ago I wouldn't have known better and thought I would be alone in that time, and today I am glad I won't be. Thank you Charlie, for finding me and becoming a part of our lives. You have helped us so much and I have never felt like I've had a stronger family bond than I do with you. I know you miss Michael too, and that feeling is priceless to me being that he never had anyone other than myself care for him like a parent.
Thursday, May 26, 2005
Jake needs it, Muffers needs it, I need it.
Michael is leaving this Saturday to work with his Uncle Paul on the farm for the summer. It sure is gonna be lonely without him. He's a quiet kinda guy but that makes no difference, he will be greatly missed not being around. I will probably call him every night for the first month. I hope he'll come back.
Well since I haven't properly introduced my family and here I am talking about them, let me tell you a little bit more.
Michael is 16, the oldest son, very tall and a thinker. He likes to write books, read The Hobbit, listen to music, and is still a student driver, so you might not be too safe on the Utah County roads for now. Jake is 14, the middle child. He likes to play football, baseball, and anything that involves action outdoors. He is a social butterfly and cracks everyone up.
Savannah is just 16 months old on Sunday. She loves to play outside and have someone read her books. Her favorites are Tyrone the Horrible and Hop on Pop. She is the youngest, but for how long, I don't know. Charlie is my husband. We met on MSN Chat in July of 2002. He and I traveled between Utah and Wyoming to see each other after we got to know one another online and on the phone for two months. We got married July of 2003 and now have a home and three kids instead of just two! (Hence that is where Savannah came in.)
Can't forget about the cats, now can we? Muffers, black and white in the back, and Kittens. Age 3 & 2. (Almost)
I suppose I will stop by Dad's to say hello and that I didn't forget him on Memorial Day, but he knows I think about him all the time already. It's year two without him, and it seems he never left and unbelievable he's not still here yet at the same time there is a big empty void only leaving his memory in it's presence. Wish he could come visit for real. This time of year was his favorite. If he were here, he'd be wanting everyone over for a BBQ or weenie roast this weekend. He'll be here, but not in tangible form, so we'll be celebrating with him only in a different way.
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Can I just tell you the smell an onion leaves in the depths of layers of the human epidermis holds such an existence as if it were a creature God created himself? So it's the day after we made shish kebobs, and of course we used the cute little pearl onions that fit so snugly on the
skewer along with the other choice veggies and meat. Well getting them peeled is about a chore and a half, but it doesn't end there. The smell they left in my fingers just permeates to no end. Do markets sell pre-peeled vegetables outside of cans? Have they even thought to?
I love onions, but at what point does a person realize that maybe if they had plastic gloves around the kitchen by some odd chance they'd come in handy?
Hmmm... Now if that's not a Martha Stewart tip of the day, I don't know what is.
So the teriyaki chicken kebobs turned out magically delicious, however next time there will be a few changes to the selection of goodies:
Mushrooms will be a keeper and yellow squash will be a new treat for next round. And since we've not made shrimp kebobs yet, we're not too sure what would be good to skew with those little guys? Any ideas?
My husband and I just love experimenting with food and BBQ. Nothing better than a summertime full of marinated meat and yes, onions!